2020 Geek-A-Long: Warlock

Everyone loves the Warlock. It’s a magic user who makes a deal with something, be it an unknowable eldritch, infernal soul agents, fey dealmakers, celestial spirit brokers, or shadowy stabbiness. That something gives you power and skill to take on foes and asks for little in return, depending on how kind your DM is. Other times, it asks for you to slowly kill the rest of your party by using groan worthy puns at least once a day. Warlocks are fun because you can really lean in to the strangeness and outcast status, even compared to other adventurers. Even their rules for spell casting work differently enough to make it feel like a completely alien way of interacting with the world, especially if you have spent that last 20 years casting X spells per day before needing to sleep for 8 hours. 

That being said, Warlocks do one thing very well. They are Eldritch Blasters. They have plenty of utility but for most part, Warlocks are a focus for the cantrip Eldritch Bolt. It’s like being a Ranger but instead of having a longbow, you have a demon telling you to shoot the Paladin in the back for that one time he didn’t smile at your joke. 

I recently played a Warlock in a game with some strangers. One of the others surprised the whole group by choosing to *also* play a Warlock, even though he said he would be a Cleric. When combat started, I dropped the Hex spell and used Eldritch Blast, which is the most common thing a Warlock will do in combat. The other player said, “Oh, you are one of *those* warlocks.” I could have thrown a handful of dice at him, if it wouldn’t have bounced off my computer screen and scattered all over the room since we were playing online. Listen, bud, play how you want, but don’t act like I’m some played out trope while your edgy Tiefling sits there and literally asks the first npc they see for raven feathers so you can look more gothic in your winter cloak! I swapped my character over to Artificer to better gel with the party. Two sessions later, they started using Eldritch Blast. Because yeah, it really is that good. 

Whether you’re knitting, crocheting, or cross stitching this square, you can download the Warlock pattern here. Instructions and charts for both knit and crochet are listed in the pattern. When you’re finished making it, don’t forget to Instagram your squares at us @lattesandllamasyarn with the hashtag #geekalong! Want to hang out with other people making the blanket? You can find moral support in the Geek-A-Long group on Ravelry here.

~Megan-Anne

Listen, I love a Tiefling Warlock with emo bangs and wings as much as the next dice roller, but don’t act like you are being innovative while my techno-shadow dwarf hexer is too passe for your sophisticated tastes.