My mother never let me play Resident Evil. She insisted that it was too scary. Not for me, I was a mature twelve-year-old that could totally handle PG-13 movies and even some R rated ones. Really, I was ahead of the curve. I had been 5′ 2″ for a few years and that should’ve counted for something. But, she decided it was too intense for my younger siblings and I never got to play the game, which is why my growth was stunted and I never grew past five feet two inches.
What I’m saying is that if my mother would’ve let me play Resident Evil, I’d be at least three inches taller and wouldn’t have to crawl into the cold case at the grocery store in order to reach the good Greek yogurt. It’s all science really.
Anyway, by the time Resident Evil 2 came out in 1998 and my parents had realized that it would probably be okay if my little brother or sister watched me play the game, my life was consumed by Ocarina of Time. I lived for Legend of Zelda and ended up missing the Resident Evil boat. My first actual exposure to the game ended up being in 2002 when they released the movie, which is a fact that I lied to my husband about when we first met. He would tell me these cute stories about watching his Dad play and having to hide the fact that it gave him nightmares or else his mom wouldn’t let him stay up to watch anymore. It wasn’t until we were compiling the list of video games for this year that the truth came out.
Him: How could you forget Resident Evil? You have Ni No Kuni on here, and no one has ever heard of that.
Me: backing away slowly because he has crazy eyes Funny story… I, uh… I’ve never played it before. It just slipped my mind.
Him: Our marriage is founded on lies!
Alright, he didn’t actually yell, “Our marriage is founded on lies.” My husband is the strong, silent, Ron Swanson type. He said it in his usual deadpan way and I apologized for my deception by making him candied bacon. And then I was “treated” to a delightful lecture about Resident Evil’s influence on the survivor horror genre and how it helped pave the road for others.
Whether you’re knitting, crocheting, or cross stitching this square, you can download the Resident Evil pattern here. Instructions for both knit and crochet are listed in the pattern. When you’re finished making it, don’t forget to tweet or instagram your squares at me @jac_attacking or Megan-Anne @Doctor_Llama with the hashtag #geekalong!
If you’re having trouble with double-sided knitting, we have a how-to video here and a tutorial on crochet here. Want to hang out with other people making the blanket? You can find moral support in the Geek-A-Long group on Ravelry here.
In case you’re wondering, Ni No Kuni isn’t on the blanket this year. I pouted and sulked about it for a whole hour after I admitted other video games were slightly more important.
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