Yarn Content Aversions

Everyone has their weird ticks. My mother can’t stand the sound of a spoon hitting the side of a bowl. Megan-Anne becomes irrationally angry at people who slurp their food and my husband can’t wear anything other than pajama pants in the house. Like, when he gets home from work, you can’t even say hi to him until he has on his stretchy pants. Me, I hate the feel of cotton yarn and velvet. I don’t know why, but those textures make my skin crawl. My niece, Mabel the Merciless, has this velvet dress some evil person bought her, and Megan-Anne affectionately calls it her, “Anti-Aunt Dress.” I swear that she puts her in that thing just to watch me cringe.

Anyway, while we were unpacking the inventory from our show at Indie Knit and Spin, my shame finally came to light:

MEGAN-ANNE: How have you gone this long without touching this yarn? We’ve had Baah-Free since August.

ME: You know I hate the feel of cotton yarn.

HER: You said you liked it! That’s why I ordered it.

ME: **blank stare**

HER: OMG, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? **starts shoving yarn at me** Pick a colorway and go home. You better come back on Monday with a sample. Go knit a cowl or something. We need a free pattern for Easter.

To be honest, it was sort of funny to watch her have that flashback moment like at the end of a mystery movie where she replayed every moment I interacted with the yarn. Me putting on my rubber gloves for the day before I threw the naked yarn in to soak. Me asking her to pack the Baah-Free Yarn while I dealt with a different base. Her putting the yarn up on display while I conveniently moved onto a different section.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve always loved our hand painted colorways on this yarn. I think they’re gorgeous and I’m proud of our work. It was important to Megan-Anne to add a baby friendly yarn and I wanted something that people with wool allergies could use. Being biased against cotton yarn, I just trusted her judgement to go with the 100% pima cotton. But now I feel like a complete idiot.

Mabel in her Mabellina Ballerina Tee by Megan-Anne.

We can all agree that dishcloth yarn has its place. I’ve used it to crochet homewares as gifts, and I hated every minute of it. A few years ago, someone convinced me that I just didn’t know good cotton. I took a chance on Spud & Chloe’s Sweater yarn, which is 55% Superwash Wool and 45% Cotton, and despised it. I ended up giving away the finished product. The colors were great, but I couldn’t stand the feel of the yarn. I swore off cotton forever and decided that people were liars.

Looking back, the whole thing is ridiculous. I feel like one of those people who say that all acrylic yarns are scratchy, because their only interaction with it was Red Heart Super Saver. I shouldn’t have been so stubborn.

The hardest part about all of this was having to admit to Megan-Anne how much I loved working with Baah-Free. Even after I had to tare out my cowl and cast on again with 10 less stitches, it really stood up to the abuse. It knitted up like I had never ripped out 20 rounds. Right after I posted that picture on Instagram, she started spamming me with text messages saying, “Shame. Shaaaaaaame. KNITSHAME!” Then, she gloated all day Monday. I’m actually surprised we managed to get any work done considering the fact that she relished in I-told-you-so’s for most of the day.

My knitshame aside, I’m super happy with how this cowl design is coming together. I made the right choice to start over when I did. The triangles create a faux ribbing that accentuates the zig-zags more. I can’t wait to share the pattern with you for Easter!

I concede to pima cotton, but I will never get over my hatred of velvet.